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"See what is invisible and you will see what to write." A Love Song for Bobby Long

It looks so empty, but you can see the lines between my writing.
I'm resolute to let you know there's something in the silence.
I'll draw the shadows if you can trace the sun,
but don't close your eyes in the searching.
Is there an edge to the pages we turn,
or do we just get lost in the madness?
posted by megan 10:24 PM

My Broken Sisters

Sometimes all we've held is a loss in the palm of our hand.
The empty aching and the days that never end.
I hear you crying, you're alone and longing...
Only we know what its like to be robbed of what you are through the losses of another.
The pieces of him that he lost over there... All the things you'll never have or longed to feel.
The pain of death sometimes sharpens the joy of what we do have, shimmering in the light of a love we must live in black and white, never knowing when the next moment will end.
I wish I could say it won't always be this way. That we can wake up one day and be like everyone else.
But you know who we carry with them, who will never walk this imperfect earth again, their memory never fades.
We live like this, pouring out our tears alone, holding each other up though we're depleted, and watching a faraway land of suffering float through our love's eyes so that you will be robbed of nothing.
And that will never be a loss.

Military wives
posted by megan 1:11 AM

It fell on my tear-soaked shoe, dazzling me with its tender petals brought alive by the sun.
I smiled and looked up to its heavenly home, now abandoned as a result of its soft decline.
Spring filtered down on me and I realized how long it had been since I'd lifted my eyes higher than this;
up to our Maker, the one who created us with love and planned this happenstance long before then.
Someone told me that I was young before and I laughed until I looked in their eyes and saw it was true.
There are times I let go for just long enough to remember that life is more than just surviving the pain.
I can lift my eyes and see the light before it falls to shadows. It is faithful each day.
Maybe I won't see the holes this time, I'll trip and fall and I'll hurt again, but at least I can watch as hope streams down to lift my heart heavenward.
posted by megan 11:47 PM

Each time we die we learn to live again.
-Unknown
posted by megan 2:49 AM

How can you tell him what I am when you haven't bought the rights?
I saved myself for him, then fell into his arms, and for once I felt whole.
Now you're stripping that from me and leaving me naked in the shadows of your so called maturity.
I never felt more ashamed to open up to one person with such raw vulnerability than when you found me there and tore me apart.
You think you have the licence to barge into what God made whole, but you're the "no man", honey and you can tear me apart, but not us.
Because I made the choice to withstand your damage but I refuse to suffer the losses of what is mine.
So call that jealousy or choose to look in the Word you're throwing in my face and find your place at the feet of Christ and not over the head of his children.
posted by megan 2:28 AM

I can't stop it, my heart is falling down into the hollow that fills me.
Tears are out of reach and food has no taste. Sometimes I feel so lost.
I'm searching for a reason to stop the slipping. Catch me before I fall.
I just don't know why I always carry this damage, will I ever be free?
Some people think I'm perfect, so I must hide my tears beneath my skin.
posted by megan 2:14 AM

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